Weekend backpacking trip to Hub Lake, Montana (Bitterroot Mts)

dead bodies as art

NPR has had fascinating stories on Body Worlds for two days in a row. I'm intrigued enough to want to fly to an exhibit in Boston, St. Paul, Houston or Vancouver, B.C. My health care worker husband would be totally into it.

Check it out: Cadaver Exhibits Are Part Science, Part Sideshow . . . freaky. ew. cool.

renegrade writers

I read the book, but it was only today that I found The Renegrade Writer blog. Cool.

I've also read some of Linda Formichelli's articles in Writer's Digest magazine (library copies, of course).

I'm the first to admit that my freelance writing (queries and otherwise) has been pretty spartan this summer. Although I sent off a completed article last night, the previous last assignments were completed in June. However, my great excuse is that my new magazine editor/writer job has been keeping me busy. Which is true. And now that issue number two (for the bi-monthly mag I manage) was sent to the printer today, I'm wondering how I can keep up my energy and creativity for freelance writing at home, while still working maintaining positive and productive energy and creativity for the daily 9-5 p.m. staff position.

One thing about freelance writing: it sure is nice to have absolute and unlimited control over the writing topics -- of course, limited only by ability to research, find sources, etc. Of course, the easy part is always thinking of ideas. The hard work is finding a venue for publication and getting the pitch accepted. Oh, and the actual writing.

As an editor (who's also the primary writer for the 52-page magazine), I still have a wide range of creative license within the scope of the editorial content. With the tons I've learned so far (editing articles for succintness, word count constraints, readibility, style, headline writing, fact checking, etc.) my writing has improved immensely. It's a daily learning process, I believe. It's easy to write in a dull manner. And sometimes that's sort of what a first draft tends to be when there isn't a passionate, first-hand connection with the topic. (Just get down the facts and basic structure. Then breathe life into it later after some further research and reflection.)

Anyway, it's my goal to make time to create queries for regional (non-Spokane...like Seattle) and national publications, spinning off ideas from the Spokane magazines I write for.

P.S. Was this a boring post? It feels like it. Sorry.

gritty underbelly = poetry ideas

Quote of the Day:

"Spokane is not the first place in Washington you would expect to find literary types. But there has been a lively writing scene here for years, drawn by university programs, cheap housing and a gritty underbelly that provides plenty of fodder for writers."

- from the PI article, "There's no mystery to this Spokane author's success"

I'm still alive

It's just that I have a full-time writing job now at a local magazine, and had a few freelance assignments in June. This doesn't leave much time for blogging...or poetry writing, either. (I'm currently average one new poem a month. Hmmm.)

And summer time has been busy with backpacking, water skiing, cherry picking, voracious magazine reading, yard work, and dog walking. I also just finished reading The World is Flat. (If you've read it, you understand that there's a lot of information to digest. A combination of awe and sheepish admission that I only knew a small iota of this stuff, along with many "uh huh" moments because Friedman's ideas--especially why the Middle East is so bent on unflattening the global community--are understandable and right on.)

Hopefully, you who are reading this have had your own engaging, intellectual, fruitful summer time, as well.

Most importantly, what are you reading? Your comments are enthusiastically welcome.

7th grade moustache

Yes, I saw a 7th grader with a moustache this week. Faint, but visible. Little wispy hairs, not enough to shave, but enough to make him seem cool to the other boys. Plus, he was like 5'7" tall...which, if you've been around middle school kids much, you know that is really quite tall. The average 7th grade boy is maybe five feet tall, with arms and wrists like spring branches reaching out to touch anything kinesthetically interesting. I subbed for a science class where the student-teacher did everything. I was just the legal certified adult in the room, a back-up (which, there was a fight, initiated by an unwanted wet-willy, during one period--but it was like over in 20 seconds). It was a very fascinating three hours of human observation. There is an amazing amount of variety in a random sampling of twelve-year-olds. Body shape, size, work ethic, classroom behavior. Which makes the fact that someone found my blog from this search string even more humorous: "how to help students realize value of education". Hmmm, not sure I have the answer for that one.

Eight of the last ten substitute teaching days have been at a middle school...4 of which were consecutive days for the same teacher. I met a future comedian who, everyday, had a funny story to tell about his iguana and poop. Now the next three days, I have another extended assignment. The crazy thing about this week is that the weather is blazing hot here...like 90 degrees, if you can believe that. So these old schools have no AC, poor insulation, horrible ventilation, and it's a sweaty, smelly, sleep-inducing, irritating school day experience for the kids by the end of the day (and their teachers!). Somehow we all make it, but is it uncomfortable! Try putting a business CEO in that kind of work environment for 7 hours and see how he/she feels! These Spokane kids do unbelievably well, actually. They bring water bottles, wear sleeveless shirts. I told one class of 8th graders today, "Everytime you talk, you release 98.6 degree air into the room. It'll get cooler if you don't talk." They believed me, which I'm not sure that statement is false--I just don't have proof. One girl even said to me, "You should be a science teacher." I think they thought I was super-smart for knowing the body's core temperature was 98.6.

But back to the million dollar question, how do you help students realize the value of education? Show them the money! Or at least tell them about the money. Education = choices = money.

With education (and the corresponding knowledge and skills), they have more opportunities and a greater array of choices. Choices for college. Choices for jobs, careers. The choice to not live with their parents until they're thirty! And with choices for higher education and jobs, comes money (i.e., fast food server vs. engineer--as one extreme example). And with money comes more choices--where to live, what to drive, how to dress, what to eat, how one lives, etc.

If kids can see that connection, the long-term benefits of education, then maybe there's a chance.

Did I forget to tell you Yusef came to town?

Spokane's annual Get Lit! festival was a few weeks ago. Yusef Komunyakaa's poetry reading (April 21 in Cheney) was amazing. His deep, resonating voice was mesmerizing . . . which if you don't get turned on by poetry, you won't really understand what I mean.

Fun fact question: what do Yusef and I both have in common, besides a love of reading and writing poetry? We both had the same creative writing professor. Christopher Howell was Yusef's teacher at Colorado State long ago...now Chris teaches in the MFA program at Eastern. Chris's Lynx House Press also published Yusef's first book of poems, Lost in the Bonewheel Factory.

I also heard Julie Gamberg read poems from her new (and first) book, The Museum of Natural History. I highly recommend it if you enjoy lyrical poetry--you can buy it direct from EWU Press. She opened up for Nancy Pearl, who was very witty and engaging. Then Saturday night there was a late-night poetry reading at The Davenport Hotel. And then...the following Tuesday, Donald Hall (yes, Donald Hall!) gave a poetry reading at Whitworth College! Man, it was poetry heaven in Spokane! All my favorite poet/writer friends were in attendance and I shook Donald's hand, he signed my two books (Without and his book of essays), and was such an enjoyable man. Because of his age (Robert Frost was his teacher at Bread Loaf...he's almost 80 years old), I suspect he may not be giving too many more poetry readings outside of his general hometown area. So I felt very honored to have heard him read his work, plus his witty transitionary banter between his poems. (Here's a neat interview with Donald Hall.)

And to give you a taste of Julie's style, here are some of my favorite lines:

"I am not a twin and have never felt part of something larger. When I look up I do not contemplate the universe and feel tiny. I am always wide open. I am enormous."

- the last section "Pepper Shaker" from a prose (?) poem called "From the House (I)"

* * *

"The sky looms heavy as steel-toed boots.
Some years smear into the ones before and since.
A decade constructed out of smudged coffee grounds,
yellow nicotine stain, red wine spills everywhere.

It's so cold today, the sky
crammed beneath my skin."

- from "Fast Forward. Rewind. Repeat."

lines from Jack Gilbert

We find out the heart only by dismantling what
the heart knows. By redefining the morning,
we find a morning that comes just after darkness.
We can break through marriage into marriage.
By insisting on love we spoil it, get beyond
affection and wade mouth-deep into love.
We must unlearn the constellations to see the stars.

- Jack Gilbert, from his poem "Tear it Down" (The Great Fires)

His bio does not include that he was a visiting professor some years ago for Eastern's MFA program. After he left, Jonathan Johnson took over that office...and I've sat in there many times. Good vibes there. Now Nance has that office and Jonathan, now Program Director, gets one next to the main office...in case you were wondering.

halfway over

...so it's National Poetry Month, the "official" celebration that happens every April. Though some of us breathe and live poetry all the time through a combination of reading it, writing it, thinking about it. Even when I'm reading a great novel or book of non-fiction, I'm still considering the lyricism of the author's language, figurative language, what kind of spin-off image or poem could occur.

The past few nights I've had some really lucid images in my mind while drifting off to sleep. The first time it happened, a really strange and beautiful image came to me in an entire line. I remember feeling really cool I had thought of it, and that I should write it down. But I was so cozy. The bed was warm, my husband was in a deep sleep and I was only a few seconds behind him. I didn't disturb my sleep to write it down. I actually said in my head, "This is so good, I won't forget this line." Zzzzzzzzz.....Zzzzzzzz.....

I still can't remember that damn good line. But last night, it happened again. "White ducks lined up like mannequin heads"...or something like that, at least that's how it started. I was half-asleep, but still able to think: "Ok, the lucid lines are starting to come. Let them." And then words started building into complete lines! I didn't want to turn on the light. I didn't want to move at all. I wished for a dictaphone to appear on my nightstand. I'm such a slave to my art, to my calling...obviously.

But I didn't want to miss the chance of writing that one really great poem that would be "the one" to first get published in a national literary magazine. (Oh, the ambitious hope I have!)

So I did it--turned on the light, grabbed the ballpoint pen by my clock, and scribbled on the back of a library check-out receipt until I had no more room.

What I read in the morning was a little...well, odd. I still need to sort it out. The World's Greatest Line of Poetry Conceived While Half-Asleep is not going to premiere today.

So sad.

But do read a great poem today.

we all know one, don't we?

(I couldn't wait for another day to post this.)

"Regurgimailer: people who forward to everyone they know everything that lands in their in-boxes. Warnings about techniques that rapists use in parking lots; photos of adorable missing children; heart-warming lists of why women and their friendships are so wonderful; jokes about, well, everything. The fact that most of the items either have been traveling the Internet for years or turn out not to be true, or both, does not stop them. A word to regurgimailers — check Snopes.com before you forward, please." - from LISA BELKIN's article

True finding: People from North Dakota are especially prone to this, as I usually get everything they send to my mom--another ND native.

drinking coffee in Spokane

Today: Hung out with "Wide-Eyed" today for some good coffee, a walk through the park, and stimulating conversation. Colorado is lucky to have her. Rebecca for Poet Laureate in 2021!

New in the book-bag this week:

• Anne Lamott's Plan B: Further Thoughts on Faith
• ZZ Packer's Drinking Coffee Elsewhere
• 100 Essential Modern Poems, an anthology created by Joseph Parisi
• The Best American Poetry 2005
• Denise Levertov's New & Selected Essays
• The ASJA Guide to Freelance Writing
• Handbook for Freelance Writing, by Michael Perry

This afternoon: I read (quite loudly) some Yusef Komunyakaa poems on the corner of Main and Washington in front of Auntie's Bookstore while standing on top of a milk crate, as part of the Milk Crate Readings for Get Lit! In addition, I helped pass out festival programs to pedestrians (and a few drivers) with two other poets.

If you live near Spokane, Wash., you should go to at least one event--some are free or low-cost, others are worth the ticket price. Embrace a spirit of literacy! This is, like, one of the coolest things that happens every year in Spokane. Last year I met Rita Dove, Robert Bly, and David Sedaris at Get Lit! This year I'm attending the Yusef reading and Nancy Pearl event.

Writing Biz:
An interesting NYT's article, "This Boring Headline is Written for Google", about how headlines are used to generate internet traffic via search engine listings.

* * *
And finally, here's my list of recommended places to drink coffee (while writing) in Spokane:

1. Rockwood Bakery - Excellent lattes every time; delicious baked goods with half-price deals for day-old muffins and scones; great people-watching opportunities; free parking; a plethora of tables; friendly staff. Kids love coming here, too, because of their huge chocolate chip cookies and decorated seasonal cupcakes! A relaxing place to get some writing done. Their drip coffee is only $1.35 with 25-cent refills. I'm not sure if they exclusively sell Craven's Coffee

2. Starbucks - Like most major cities, there are very many locations to choose from. Some stores are not big enough to handle the number of people who want to linger for hours and write on a laptop or do homework. Sometimes fellow patrons can be fairly loud, and the crowded stores can be too chatty for reading/writing--rather than a dull background noise, it can sound like a sporadic conversational party. Great for stealing dialogue if you can pick out specific comments.

3. The Empyrean Coffeehouse - Hosts poetry readings,concerts, mini art gallery, serves individualized French Press coffee, as well as alcohol and good food. Lots of space to hang out, which seems to attract a large adolescent crowd to this downtown venue. I'm glad kids have a cool place to go, but they can be a little too rowdy for an otherwise laid-back coffeehouse culture--especially when Saturday evening poetry readings are taking place. Finding nearby parking can be difficult. Meters free after 6pm and all day Sunday.

4. Lindaman's - Delicious lattes, gourmet food, and it's okay to just get a coffee and hang out for awhile and write. The barista man creates really neat designs in your milk foam.

...But then again, you could make your own coffee at home and write at your table. That sounds like a good deal, especially when a coffee shop owner says this: “...the profit margins are the highest in the food industry. You can make a 16-ounce cup of mocha for 55 cents and sell it for $3.25 or $3.50.” - Okay then...who wants to go to the new Coffee Deluxe.

recently published

My book review of Joe Williams' book.

Also, my interview article with former Olympian and Bloomsday race director Don Kardong.

out of silence

Then

When I am dead, even then,
I will still love you, I will wait in these poems,
When I am dead, even then
I am still listening to you.
I will still be making poems for you
out of silence;
silence will be falling into that silence,
it is building music.

- Muriel Rukeyser

Considered one of the prominent foundational poets in the feminist school of poetry, Rukeyser is probably largely unknown to non-MFA readers of poetry. Out of Silence: Selected Poems is an excellent book to own. In this poem above, I like to think she's speaking to all the future women poets--her "daughters", so to speak, as if we could channel her like a muse--as well as her son and loved ones.

homemaker

"One writes to make a home for one’s self, in paper, in time, in others’ minds." – Alfred Kazin

Next deadline: April 7th - article for Northwest Runner

Currently reading: The Last Days of Dogtown, novel by Anita Diamant; and the Spring 2006 issue of Prairie Schooner

This afternoon: teaching English at a local high school

Next week: my intensive week self-directed "Freelance Writing Boot Camp" (no sub days due to Spring Break)

father of free verse

"This is what you shall do: Love the earth and sun and the animals, despise riches, give alms to every one that asks, stand up for the stupid and crazy, devote your income and labor to others, hate tyrants, argue not concerning God, have patience and indulgence toward the people, take off your hat to nothing known or unknown or to any man or number of men, go freely with powerful uneducated persons and with the young and with the mothers of families, read these leaves in the open air every season of every year of your life, re-examine all you have been told at school or church or in any book, dismiss whatever insults your own soul; and your very flesh shall be a great poem . . . ."

- Walt Whitman, from the Preface to Leaves of Grass (1855)

Harry Potter vocab list, part II

affably
aghast
airily
albeit
alchemical
amok
aquiver
bade
besotted
brooded/broodingly
chortled/chortling
cleaving
contemptuous
crenellated
cunning
curtly
dawdled
disparate
disquiet
efficacious
envisaged
exerted
feebler
fervently
filigree
furtively
genial/genially
goading
gormless
hastily
haughty
hovel
imperiously
impervious
incantations
incredulously
inexorably
inexplicable
ingenuity
inordinate
intuitive
jocularly
jowls
livid
mirthless
morose
mutinous
oblivious/oblivion
ominous
ostentatiously
pallid
pallor
phial
placidly
pouffe
procure
prodigious
putrid
ramparts
raucous
reminisce
reproving
resolutely
retching
retort
ruefully
ruse
seething
sentry
simpered
sinuously
sodden
sulky
surreptitiously
sycophantically
tersely
travesty
trawled
tripe
uncouth
unplumbed
ursurping
volition
wrest

freelance writing and coffee break reading

For the past few months I've been more seriously researching how to establish a presence and earn money as a freelance writer/editor. There is a lot of exaggerated and useless information available in the form of web sites. Here's a brief list of how to get started on this path--from someone who finally figured out where to begin in a low-cost and efficient way. (This assumes that as writer you have proven your successful writing ability through verifiable work experience with businesses &/or non-profit organizations, and you also have some publication credits. Depending on who you want to target as a freelancer, publication may not be necessary.)

1. Join a writer's forum or group. If you live in the Northwest, join www.seattlewritergrrls.org. It's not limited just to women, although that's how it started. Mainly, this is an online email discussion group for learning about issues related to writing jobs, events, and networking opportunities. There are over 1,000 members, so many potential employers are there, along with other great bits of advice. Post any valid writing-related question, and you'll get thoughtful and helpful replies from professionals who've been-there-done-that. It's a great mentoring venue. Be sure to read and understand the discussion/membership guidelines. There is also a Portland Writergrrls chapter, made up of freelance journalists. I've also started a Spokane Writergrrls chapter that's just getting going--with 10 members so far. If you live in the Spokane/CdA area, join at: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/SpokaneWritergrrls/

2. Check out www.mediabistro.com - there's a fee to join and get full access, but you can also get a free subscription to view some areas.

3. Check out the web sites of reputable freelance writers, which are used to promote their services. www.dawnweinberger.com is a very good one (she's the founder of Portland Writergrrls). You can google search for more, but also those who participate in online forums usually include their site address.

4. Do further research through books, classes, workshops, etc. Dawn's website suggests some books. Amazon has a plethora to choose from, but only one really good one is needed. I haven't decided which one I'll purchase yet. I trust Dawn's recommendations.

5. Create a small collection of writing samples to share with editors/publishers either when applying for a job or after you send them your resume and/or query letter. Perhaps even create a blog portfolio to link to online examples of your work or post samples. I always wonder about plagarism is this way, so I scanned published pages of my articles and created picture files that were then uploaded. Some writers pay for web hosting. I'm not even close to this stage yet.

6. Research your local business scene and publications which may provide freelance writing opportunities. Check out the Chamber of Commerce members, weekly and monthly magazines/publications, etc.

* * *
An amusing, even quirky, short story: My God, Is It Raining Hard ... strange and surreal. Worth a short coffee break.

* * *
How many boxes of books do you own? Using small liquor-store boxes, I'd estimate that I have about 10-15. Octavio Butler had 300! She was an African-American science fiction writer who recently passed away. I'm sorry I never heard of her before, but now I want to read Kindred.

Recently published

My article at Associated Content:
Interview with Former Olympian Don Kardong, Lilac Bloomsday Run Founder and Race Director

Vocab Words

from Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

apparition
astute
bestial
blithely
bravado
cosseted
derision
dignified
drones
eccentric
enigmatic
enmity
excruciatingly
extricated
exuberantly
furtive
indignantly
irate
jibe
liaison
pestilential
prudent
reluctant
resilient
resolutely
sardonically
secateurs
silhouette
tantamount
vindictive
vivacious

And this is just from chapters 1-14, there's still over 300 pages left to go. This is the list of words that I would pull out to assist secondary students as a reading strategy. Teach to the lowest reader, if in doubt. I'm sure these words would cause pause from the average student, either with pronunciation and/or meaning. Most kids might say they've "heard" of the word, but wouldn't actually be able to use it in his/her own conversation or written work. Moreover, they would probably be nervous to read it aloud with confidence. Some students would rather die than mispronounce a word, where smarty-pants classmates will call out the correct pronunciation right on their heels--or worse, call it out during the reader's pause before attempting it. That is the teacher's role, always to be done with kindness, naturally. It's one thing to have the teacher help you. It's a whole 'nother story when the hottie in the next row does it with the whole class as witness. Depends on the tone of voice used, of course, by the samaritan classmate. In middle school, kids are ruthless and like to show how much they know and others don't.

If Harry Potter were on the secondary curriculum list, Albus Dumbledore's dialogue would be excellent examples for teaching the usage of commas, clauses, and inflection in voice to establish characterization. A challenging sentence diagramming exercise, as well.

lack of work

“Under decentralization, the heat might bet turned down at night or the gym floor might go another year without refurnishing. In the past, if a school made such efforts to save money, the funds would only be sent back to the central office to be spent by someone else. Now it stays where it may mean a part-time reading instructor. When substitute teachers are paid by headquarters, teachers call in sick more often. When money saved on substitutes comes back to the school, absenteeism falls 40%, [William] Ouchi* says.”
- from “Schools take a lesson from big business”, USA Today, 3/9/06
(* Ouchi is a UCLA Management professor)

more from this article . . .

Good or bad?

“Principals at high schools in New York City’s autonomous zone have given up assistant principals, guidance counselors and attendance clerks. But they have been able to add so many teachers with the same budget that the number of students a teacher sees each day has been driven down from 160 to 60, Ouchi says.”

Yikes!! That's an amazing teacher-student ratio; however, I can recall numerous ways that AP's and counselors are important. Who's doing all that work for them, the principal? Or are the teachers doing more administrative and non-instructional duties to compensate for this? And last I knew an attendance clerk was busy making sure there was communication between the school and parents, and keeping track of truancies, etc. That seems important when high school kids are tempted to fool the system.

The Dark Side? . . . Teacher union president gives his 2 cents.

“ ‘Decentralization is a terrible idea that would be a disaster,’ says A.J. Duffy, president of United Teachers Los Angeles. Too many principals and assistant principals are ‘demigods who take credit for what teachers do and blame teachers for what goes wrong,’ and they would become more ‘mean spirited’ if given the power of the purse, he says.

Decentralization works in industry, Duffy says, because employees can find a similar job elsewhere if they have an abusive boss. ‘You can’t do that in schools,’ he says. ‘You either work there, or you become a welder.’ ”

--Is that really the only two choices for LA teachers? Teacher or welder? Is it really that hostile there? Duffy's comments totally undersell and underestimate the aptitute and work skills of teacher. Educators can apply their talents in numerous ways outside of the traditional teacher position--whether with businesses or non-profit organizations.

A startling example cited in the article -
NYC Catholic schools have a central office staff of 22. The NYC public school system has ten times as many students, which should correlate into 222 central office staff (using the same efficient, less bureaucratic, lean principles). Uh…no. It’s actually 25,500!! Outrageous.

eat, pray, love? sounds good to me

'Eat, Pray, Love' is a dazzling memoir of one woman's 'search for everything' is the title of a Seattle PI article about Elizabeth Gilbert's new book, Eat, Pray, Love: One Woman's Search for Everything Across Italy, India and Indonesia . . . sounds very interesting. Gilbert's reading in Seattle at Eliot Bay Bookstore on Tuesday evening. I'd go if I lived within an hour's drive. Spokane usually isn't fortunate to get many authors doing their West Coast book tour to make the 1-hour flight east (or 4-5 hr drive) for a reading/book signing.

something i wish was in spokane

...as found at Seattle Weekly.

Shar[e]d Ingredients
Two shows explore the combination of verbal and visual poetry.

husky lovers

No, not large, big-boned people...husky as in the dog breed, those who love huskies.

If you love my Emerson or the general beauty and energy of these happy, strong dogs, you must see the movie Eight Below. (Fun fact: There were 2 dogs for each dog character, so look-alikes to make sure there was a back-up as needed.) See it for the dogs and the scenery, not the human actors. And Disney sure knows how to manipulate music, close-ups, and dog sounds to maximize the emotional impact and trigger audience response. Even my husband felt a tiny bit vaclempt. P.S. The dog known as "Shorty" in the film, looks just like Emerson--except for two same-colored eyes.

And this time of year is Iditarod time. The official web site, sponsored by the Iditarod Trail Committee, even has stuff for teachers to use in the classroom, updates. Some other good Race sites include: Dogsled.com, Cabela's site (Always one of my favorite to check with great daily updates and pictures...they are Jeff King's sponsor, and I met King in 2000 while visiting his husky kennel. Nice guy.), and the Anchorage Daily News.

We take Emerson on his own personalized mini-Iditarod races all the time. On Saturday, he got a 5-mile mountain bike adventure through Manito Park and the surrounding neighborhood--with steep grassy slopes and dirt singletracks. His tongue flapped out of his mouth and his ears bent back just like he was heading towards Nome.

a man named Frank

Fun Quote of the Day:

"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." - Benjamin Franklin
* found in the online pages of Alaska Amber Brewing Co.

Yesterday, I finished reading Angela's Ashes by Frank McCourt. I know, I know I'm a gazillion years behind the rage of this book, which won a Pulitzer in 1997. (In my defenese, that was the year I student-taught, graduated from college, and started my first year of full-time teaching--so I have valid excuses for being a little behind in my reading. Although, I did start reading it once. I think I just wasn't in the frame of mind to read it then, nor finish it in time to return to the library.)

I don't claim to have read a plethora of Pulitzer books, but I have read a number of memoirs and can appreciate the strengths of this book which make it stand out from other memoirs.

First, honesty. McCourt does not have to dramatize his personal story, because it has very real gritty and tragic facts. It is what it is. The telling of the history moves swiftly with just the right amount of detail. McCourt, I can imagine, checked facts and details with his brothers and perhaps other relatives, as needed to maintain accuracy. (I haven't researched the writing process behind his memoir, so I may be wrong--but I suppose the answer might be found here.) I don't recall the memoir saying things like, "To the best of my memory..." or other disclaimers. Undoubtedly, when you've endured Ireland the way McCourt has you either have an excellent memory (tragedy being a powerful glue), or you have a bad memory in order to block out the pain and protect the psyche. I believe McCourt has an excellent memory, especially since he recounted many of his childhood anecdotes for his students throughout his career as a high school English teacher.

Second, realistic voice. McCourt uses a narrative voice in his first memoir that isn't one of the enlightened adult looking back, using lyrical prose to dazzle the reader and sensationalize scenes. Rather, the succinctness of the narrative is believable as an adult-voice, and also that of the young McCourt, using present tense--to tell the story as if only a few days or hours removed from the events being described. Juvenile, but not childish. Kids like McCourt grew up fast in order to survive. The language used, word choices and not just the dialetic/slang, is what grounds this authentic, trustworthy voice. My favorite term he uses: "the excitement". I also enjoyed the unflattering and blatantly honest way he describes his experiences growing up Irish-Catholic. The emptiness, his fascination with the stories of the saints, the hypocrisy.

And the third strength (which I sort of mentioned above), is the succinct, concise re-telling. In 363 pages, he recounts his life up to age 19. (The only other memoir I've read which covers as many years is Lillian Helman's.) It's consistently engaging because it's not overloaded, long-winded, or otherwise drawn out with redundant, unneccesary details. And regarding page 364...did McCourt have the idea for his second memoir in mind before his first one went to press, or was the second titled Tis because of page 264? Just a question I have.

So, that's my short review. I think this book would be a hoot to listen to on tape, but I think I've heard just enough Irish brogue to get a sense of it...och.

of course

"In a complex text, organization may be elaborate, messages may be implicit, interactions among ideas or characters may be subtle, and the vocabulary is demanding and intricate."
- from "Study: Reading Key to College Success"

I think this absolutely characterizes excellent literature from the mediocre. Whether it's a poem, short story, non-fiction essay, or novel, the more students practice reading and understanding the text--the organization of action and character development, motivation of the characters, intent of the author, the thematic messages and issues, all of the elements that work together to form an engaging and insightful work of literature...crafted in language that is precise and intelligent, without cliches and simplistic descriptions...this package is a complex text.

I have always loved to read. This kind of innate fascination and obsession with reading is probably the foundational common trait among all writers. It is also probably an inherent quality in every teacher and professor of English.

Unfortunately, the nature of teaching today's high school students is that many students do not have this same admiration and desire for the written word. Whether or not saturation with books and reading is essential in developing this trait, lest it be lost forever, I can't say. I do know from my studies in literacy and reading skills, the earlier children are introduced to the concepts of reading, the structure of books and literary forms, and surrounded by healthy, positive language, the more likely a child is to be an excellent reader--not only in skill, but also in his/her motivation to read. Choosing a book over a movie, for example. Actually reading the assigned homework chapters for English class. Actually reading a book!

I'm also understanding of the reality that certain speech impairments and developmental issues can delay a child's reading readiness and ultimately impact his/her literary. Depending on what kind of parental support and intervention takes place, and how early, this usually doesn't impact a child through adulthood. In fact, the most motivated and dedicated students are the ones who overcame a speech impediment, dyslexia, or other difficulty in regards to their ability to read and comprehend.

When I was teaching full-time, I required my students to complete an Outside Reading requirement worth 10% of their final grade. For regular level students, this meant they had to read 300 pages (for total credit) of literature (fiction or non-fiction) each quarter. Honors students had to read 500 pages a quarter. The book could not be any from the course curriculum, or a book they read in previous years for English class. Movie books received 1/2 credit. (Which became increasingly difficult as more and more good novels have been adapted into screenplays and produced.) I first learned about this concept from Jane Schaffer when I attended my first workshop with her in the fall of 1997, my first year as a teacher.

My second year of teaching I broadened the scope to also include "Literary Experiences"--where students could attend a play or poetry/book reading and write a short review about the experience. It wasn't as time consuming as reading, but not very many chose this route because they didn't want to pay to see a performance or simply weren't interested. Most did the reading, and after missing it for a quarter quickly realized what a difference it made to their grade. I evaluated students' credit based on "Oral Book Reports". Without fail, I could tell if a student had actually read the book or not. Open it up to a random page, read and passage, then ask the student, "Tell me what's going on." If students haven't read the book, or haven't read to that passage yet and were trying to test on the whole book, it becomes very apparent--they stumble through an explanation, are vague, etc. If that haven't read but had a friend fill them in enough or they somehow otherwise were slick enough to sound like they kind of read, I'll pick a few more passages to have them explain. Often I'll ask specific questions about the character development, theme, or action--usually when I've also read the book. And since I've read many, many books, the students knew they couldn't fool me easily.

My favorite times were when I caught students trying to fib their way through an Oral Book Report. I'd usually make up an event or a character and ask a question about it. Because the student hadn't read the book, he/she would try to create a fabricated answer for my fabricated question. I remember once asking a student who claimed to have read a science-fiction book.

After a few stumbling responses, I asked, "So tell me about the character Vader." The student: "Oh, he's the guy who...." Uh, no. Vader is in Star Wars.

Overall, the most rewarding part of requring Outside Reading was that I was had 5 minute book discussion with each student at least once a quarter. Some students read piles of books, over a thousand pages for the school year. I remember one 11th grade boy who claimed to have never read a book. I told him to go get Harry Potter from the school library, and I bet he would love it. This was back in 1999 when Potter was still really, really the IN thing. He had to be on the waiting list for awhile, and I knew the other student who had the book checked out. So I told her, "Hey, hurry up and finish that book, I know a kid who needs to read it!" It was like an after-school special movie, because that 17-year-old kid read Harry Potter and loved it. He came in so excited on a Monday, telling all about how he read it over the weekend and just couldn't put it down. How we wanted to get the next book right away and start reading again. And the awesome thing for him was that because HP books are so thick, he got most of his pages read for the semester!

I believe the Outside Reading requirement gave students the opportunity to read. When it's not cool and they are so busy with sports, activities, jobs, and friends, this gave them the excuse to kick back and read. Isn't that why some adults go on vacation now? Just to lounge by a pool and read? Read in the airport, on the plane, laying at the beach. Read in the hammock, on the couch, in the park, in a coffee shop.

And by giving them the opportunity to read, they practiced their reading skills. They improved their literacy. They engaged in reading complex texts. Sustained commitment to a work of art. God knows this can't hurt 'em. And 10 minutes each class day of SSR (sustained silent reading) was also helpful. Man, I miss that part of teaching.

* * *
Here's one teacher's webpage for outside reading that includes a book list. neat.

bloggers turned novelists

From Time for the last post -

"Ana Marie Cox also stands as a prime example of another under-acknowledged weakness of the blogger uprising: to make it in blogging seems to mean making it out of blogging. By the time the Vanity Fair photo spread on Gawker Media hit the store shelves in January, Cox had left Wonkette to focus on promoting her novel Dog Days, a satire on Washington DC for which she was paid $250,000. Elizabeth Spiers, too, defected from Gawker after about a year on the job, and her satirical novel will be published next year. Its title is curiously apropos: And They All Die in the End."

"The point is, any writer of talent needs the time and peace to produce work that has a chance of enduring."

Interesting.

* * *

Time

Peace

dada in D.C.

Surrealist poets would be delighted to know about the dada exhibit at Washington's National Gallery--although this article doesn't give mention about Tristan Tzara founding the movement, just his friends Hugo and Richard.

For my MFA Surrealism Poetry course, I chose Tristan Tzara--the poet & essayist known as the founder of dada--as my research subject. In addition to the extensive final research paper, I had to write a creative series of works modeled after our historical surrealist writer. Here are some excerpts from my Tzara-inspired prose, modeled after his "Dada Manifesto" and "Lecture on Dada". (Reading it now, I realize it makes better sense if combined with reading Tzara's actual manifesto. Or perhaps I was hyped up on coffee at the time of composition.)

III
We have always made poorly-constructed rhymes and foamy espresso beverages, but the greatest mistakes are the poems we have written. Gossip has one single bad breath: the rejuvenation and maintenance of biblical and Shakespearean traditions. Gossip is only glorifying itself (like cheerleaders and kids who shop at Old Navy), encouraged by the state-controlled tobacco company (and large home breweries), the international airports of America, all the hospitals in Spokane, the funeral and basket-weaving industry and coffee factories . . . The form under which it most often appears is DADA, and sometimes surrealism in the form of a graduate level Monday night class in downtown Spokane.
. . .
Is simplicity simple, or dada?

I consider myself rather likeable. (but still, I am at times a wee bit selfish)


IV
Is poetry necessary? I know that those who shout in the most nasal voice against it are actually preparing a comfortable obsession for it; they call it the Future Hygienic (or as my dentist would say, a Floss-Free New Order).

People (like professors and other intellectuals) envision the (ever-impending) annihilation of art, independent films in Spokane, and coffee houses that stay open after 10:00 p.m. Here they are looking for a more art-like art. Hygiene becomes mygod mygod purity. Must we no longer believe in words or x-rays? Since when do they express the contrary of what the organ that utters them things and wants?* Herein lies the great secret: Thought is made in the mouth. (and sometimes in the buttocks)I still consider myself very likeable. (And not quite so selfish anymore.)

A great Spokane County philosopher (originally from Canada) said: Thought and the past are also very likeable.
* Thinks. wants, and wishes to think

. . .

VI
It seems that this exists: more logical, very logical, too logical, less logical, not very logical, really logical, fairly logical.
Well then, draw the inferences.
"I want spicy rice."
Now think of the person you would most love to tickle to death.
"Have you?"
Tell me the number and I'll tell you the Power Ball lottery number in all 27 states.

VII
A seminary student, in other words with his eyes closed, Dada places before action and above all: self-loathing and insecure Doubt. DADA doubts everything. Dada is an armadillo. Dada is a Chihuahua wearing a skirt. Dada is cold cous cous. Everything is Dada, too. Beware of Dada.

Anti-dadaism is a disease: selfkleptomania, man's normal condition, is DADA.
But the real dadas are against DADA. Just like the real coffee addicts make their own brew at home.

The selfkleptomaniac.

The person who steals - without thinking of her own interests or knitting needs, or of her will - elements of her individual, is a kleptomaniac. She steals herself. She causes the characters that alienate her from the community to disappear. She hides behind her cell phone, purse, and stiletto shoes. The bourgeois resemble one another - they're all alike. They used not to be alike. They have been taught to steal - stealing has become a fad (like Converse and bubblegum) - the most convenient and least dangerous thing is to steal oneself. They are all very poor. They are all on food stamps or living off student financial aid, subsidized Stafford loans. The poor are against DADA. They have a lot to do with their brains. They'll never get to the end of it. They work. The poor are against DADA. He who is against DADA is for me, a famous man said, but then he died after a few too many cigarettes and tequila shots. They buried him like a true dadaist. Guten Tag Dada. Beware! And remember this example.

* * *

how i became charming, likeable and delightful
- by amy tzara

1st December 2003

I sleep very late – sometimes past 8:00. I commit suicide at 65.725%. My life is very cheap (like a Mexican rug), it's only 4.25% of life for me. My life has 4.25% of life. It lacks arms, strings, a few buttons, and two ovaries. 5% is devoted to a state of semi-lucid stupor accompanied by vegetarian crackling and nail-biting. This 5% is called DADA. So life is cheap like Wal-Mart. Death is a bit more expensive like The Bon-Macy’s. But life is charming and death is equally charming (though I can’t remember the last time I died).

A few days ago I was at a meeting of imbeciles. There were a lot of people there. Everyone was charming, except for the girl with the hairy lips. Amy Tzara, a small, absurd and insignificant poet was giving a lecture on the art of becoming charming. She was charming, at that. Everyone is charming and sometimes a little too funny. And witty. It's delightful, isn't it? Everyone is delightful, at that. 9.75 degrees below zero. It's charming, isn't it? No, it isn't charming. God isn't up to it, nor is his Mother. He isn't even in the Spokane city directory or the yellow pages. He doesn’t even have his own website yet. But even so he's charming.

Ambassadors to Seattle, MFA poets, princes, musicians, Nirvana fans, journalists, Hollywood actors, writers, diplomats, directors, dressmakers, socialists, princesses and baronesses are charming.

You are all charming, very subtle, witty and delightful (and I must say, I love the way you smell). Amy Tzara says to you: she's quite willing to do something else, but she prefers to remain an idiot, a practical joker and a hoaxer who still laughs at whoopee cushions. Be sincere for a moment: what I've just said to you - is it charming or idiotic? Is it worthy of an MFA final project?

There are some people (journalists, lawyers, amateurs, philosophers) who even think that business, marriages, visits, wars, various conferences, limited companies, politics, accidents, dance halls, economic crises, fits of hysterics, are variations of dada.

Not being a properly trained hypnotist, I don't share their opinion. I believe rather, that dada is only a divinity of the Da Vinci Code, which must quite simply be placed beside the other forms of the new mechanism of Spokane city maps and downtown one-way streets.
Is simplicity simple, or dada?
I consider myself rather likeable. (Please hold your applause until after I leave. Thank you.)

* * *

Surrealist writing exercises
Most people have heard of The Exquisite Corpse game. Mad Libs are another great tool for getting at the spirit of dadaism--the not-completely-sensical cohesion of language. (Another helpful instruction site.)

How to make a Dadaist Poem (method of Tristan Tzara)

Some Tzara poems:
The Great Lament Of My Obscurity Three
Vegetable Swallow

one of my favorite poems

"When I'm writing, I know I'm doing the thing I was born to do." - Anne Sexton

Welcome Morning

There is joy
in all:
in the hair I brush each morning,
in the Cannon towel, newly washed,
that I rub my body with each morning,
in the chapel of eggs I cook
each morning,
in the outcry from the kettle
that heats my coffee
each morning,
in the spoon and the chair
that cry “hello there, Anne”
each morning,
in the godhead of the table
that I set my silver, plate, cup upon
each morning.

All this is God,
right here in my pea-green house
each morning
and I mean,
though often forget,
to give thanks,
to faint down by the kitchen table
in a prayer of rejoicing
as the holy birds at the kitchen window
peck into their marriage of seeds.

So while I think of it,
let me paint a thank-you on my palm
for this God, this laughter of the morning,
lest it go unspoken.

The Joy that isn’t shared, I’ve heard, dies young.

- Anne Sexton

* * *
"Welcome Morning", from her 1975 book The Awful Rowing Toward God (published after her death) illustrates a compelling facet of Sexton's persona which contradicts the dominant memory of her poetic life--depression and suicide. This poem is full of hope, light, sincere thankfulness for her moments of joy; the tactile sensations that gave Anne pleasure and peace. I am filled with a sense of grief for the inner turmoil she endured before and after this poem was composed. I think anyone who suffers from depression should post this by her bed and read it in the morning upon waking, that sometimes most difficult time of the day. To remember the hope. And consider her own personal reasons for giving thanks.

I'm going to read this poem at next month's reading to celebrate Women's History Month. It will take place at The Empyrean Coffee House in Spokane, and is being organized by some of my MFA alumni poet friends. Each reader will first read a poem or two published by prominent female poets, and then some of her/his own original work.

If you live in or near Spokane, you should come. Saturday, March 18 @ 7:00 p.m.

on the brain

Education-related subjects have been the substance of recent posts, which is an obvious sign that I'm not spending enough time in the realm of poetry. I can't help it. I am fascinated by Joe Williams's book Cheating Our Kids: How Politics and Greed Ruin Education. It feels so subversive to read it during the "prep periods" while substitute teaching. I love that. It's like I'm reading under the antagonist's nose. Well, not really. Williams's main focus is about the corruption and problems of America's largest urban school districts. His case examples have been with New York City, LA, San Diego, St. Louis, and Milwaukee mainly. As an education reportor, he lived/worked in Milwaukee, and now is in NY (and his sons attend its public schools). He asserts that parents who exercise choice for their children's education will choose either a private school, charter school (if that option exists), or--depending on the financial means of the family--move to the suburbs.

What Williams assumes is that the suburbs, simply because they are not so big and urban, are better school district systems. I believe that there is still excessive and unnecessary administrative systems and expenditures that have little or no direct impact on children--neither the instruction and learning process, or the overall classroom/school experience. For example, how many assistants are really needed in each department at the District office? Go to a district's home page and search the district personnel listings and you may find for one administrative department all of the following: Project Manager, Coordinator, Project Supervisor, and Project Assistants.

There's a lot I agree with in his book. In fact, most of it. I just makes sense, and he has convincing proof and citations. I wonder if the NEA has commented on this book yet?

Enough serious reading.

* * *
Back to Poetry . . .
On the literary bookshelf now: Appalachia by Charles Wright - a recommended/loaned book of poems from a member of my monthly poetry workshop group.

Indulgent Reading
Just borrowed from a friend, but haven't started: Harry Potter book 6 - Will this be 600+ pages of entertaining distraction when I could be reading and writing poetry?

From the library, but haven't started yet: Angela's Ashes - I started it years ago, when it was still the hot book to read; however, I just couldn't sustain interest for whatever reasons at that time. But since reading McCourt's Teacher Man, I now have a greater intrinsic desire to read his first memoir (and not just read because it's literary and everyone else has read it).

* * *
Advice for job seeking (esp. for college teaching) - when not to have a blog, or admit to it..or in other words, how blogging could hurt your career.

* * *
favorite food of the week: steamed white rice with cilantro
how to eat it: wrapped in a wheat tortilla with mozzarella cheese, lettuce, salsa, and guacamole ...easy to eat while reading online articles.

* * *
State of the Laptop: faded letters - d (gone, totally); c (mostly); v, n, s (partially extinct); m (endangered). Wazzup wit dat, Dell?

more, amour

LOVE SONG (SMELT)

When I say 'you' in my poems, I mean you.
I know it’s weird: we barely met.
You must hear this all the time, being you.

That night we were at opposite ends of
the long table, after the pungent
Russian condiments, the carafes of tarragon vodka,

the chafing dishes full of boiled smelts
I was a little drunk: after you left,
I ate the last smelt off your dirty plate.

- Dan Chiasson, from Natural History

c/o Knopf Poetry/Random House's "The Borzoi Reader"

Doing my part to spread the love...
"National Poetry Month 2006 is approaching, and if you subscribe to this newsletter you'll receive poetry by e-mail every day in April. But you know, sending someone poetry TODAY—and letting them know that they will receive 30 more starting April 1st—is a lovely way to show how much you care. It could also be seen as a lame excuse for not going out and actually buying a Valentine's Day gift, but don't let that get in the way of sharing a few poems. Face it: we could all use a little more poetry in our lives. And what better time than now. New subscribers can sign up at knopfpoetry.com: http://www.knopfpoetry.com"

C’mon, Washington!

Read this today in a new book I picked up at the library – Cheating Our Kids: How Politics and Greed Ruin Education, by Joe Williams. This excerpt is from page 25-26.

Charter schools are public schools that are allowed to operate independently of the traditional public school system. They are not normally part of “the system” but are treated instead by the state that grants the charter as if they were their own system. By their definition, they have an easier time making the most efficient use of their per-pupil funding allocations because there are fewer hands in the cookie jar. This is one of the reasons charter schools have been so popular with both fiscal conservatives and social liberals. Charter schools have emerged all over the country as one way to shift the focus of education back to students. Charter schools recognize parents and their children as consumers purchasing an important service. They build their budgets and programs around the needs of students or they don’t stay in business for very long.

Because charter schools tend to be small and don’t normally have to support a bloated bureaucracy, the money they get to educate kids tends to actually get spent on things that are more than remotely related to instruction. And even more importantly, when children leave the school, their money leaves with them. Parents are treated as customers with power, which is exactly the way it should be.

* * *

Today I subbed at a school that services high school students with severe psychiatric disorders. As one teacher there described it, they are the way point between the student's regular school and a psychiatric hosptial. It costs $55 a day, per student, she said. There are three teachers, some IA's, and a therapist or two. Only 30 students enrolled. For my classes today, there were no more than six actually present during the period. It's one one of the easiest days ever.

The staff was welcoming and very helpful. Even offering me coffee from their morning brew (I had my own, though). The teacher I was covering came in early to organize her lesson plans, because she woke up with the flu. The IA was attentive to the students. The students were kind, respectful, mellow, quiet, on-task, hardworking. No wonder this program has had such success through the years. And the students don't want to leave, instead choosing to graduate through this alternative program, rather than return to their "home" school.

I think my comfort level today was aided by a great sense of compassion for these students.

Oprah Power

I have never picked out a book to read just because Oprah said so. Although, I have read books that were also on her "Book Club" list. Undoubtedly, Oprah has picked some very merit-worthy books, with high-quality literary value. However, I hope more readers may soon pick for themselves, considering the Frey controversy. I know someone who considered buying his book based on Oprah's praise, yet decided against it after browsing through it a bit and seeing the plethora of profanity. Although, word choices that include profanity are sometimes necessary to establish characterization and the tone/mood of the scene and/or conflict, when it's used gratuitously and for popular-appeal it's no longer literary, in my opinion. Of course, a junkie would have a potty mouth, so it's believable! Well, I haven't read Frey's book--and now I really don't want to. I heard about the brouhaha from NPR initially, but missed Oprah's public tongue-lashing of Frey. That would've been fun to see.

This interesting article from a college journalist (WWU's Western Front) is an enjoyable read, and I didn't know that a Seattle attorney was seeking monetary compensation for the time wasted by readers who finished Frey's book. That's really telling. Because, yes...reading a book is a valuable investment of time. As Bronson discusses at his Website, a book has to have characters that are worth spending 8-10 hours with (the collective amount of time it takes to read the average-sized novel). Moreover, readers spread this out over a series of days and weeks--reading in bed, the bathroom, at night...all intimate connotations. But yet, if the readers ultimately enjoyed the work and the reading experience, what's there to whine about. Yes, they feel duped--all that emotional buy-in, believing the fiction was the verifiable memoir-truth. If I were one of those people, I'd want my money back. But compensation for time? Well, can't we all probably think of a book where we'd like to be paid for the time to read it because it was: a) really boring in parts; b) really disappointing at the end; and/or c) ultimately, a let-down and did not meet our expectations. The nice part, when it's not required reading for academia, is that we can simply put it down--return it to the library, take it to the used book store for credit, sneak back and return it to the bookstore (if it still "looks" unread), or give it away to a friend (though, not too good of a friend because it's not cool to recommend books that you wouldn't even bother with).

Anyway, it's amazing how much marketing power Oprah has--the power to create a near-instantaneous bestseller out of a book, make an author a household name...at least for all those who embrace her like a religion. Can I pass her my manuscript someday?

Ooo-prah Pow-er (clap-clap, clap-clap-clap), Ooo-prah Pow-er (clap-clap, clap-clap-clap) . . . .

for writers

I get emails from the Seattle P-I whenever there's a book-related article. Today's was about Po Bronson and his new non-fiction/documentary-type book about families. Apparently, Bronson was once voted People magazine's "sexiest author alive". I didn't know they did that. I would vote Leif Enger for that title, though he's also this NPR-spiritual-husband/father/family-man, so I feel like I would only have the guts to name him "cutest author alive."

Anyway, Bronson's website included a really interesting section - Advice to Writers. Here's an excerpt:

The writing life is lonely. Taking some of that loneliness out of it helps you to hang in there. Create a supportive environment that allows you to give it the kind of time it takes. Book clubs, workshops through bookstores, extended ed classes, graduate writing programs – they may not teach you to write, but they can support you and give you time.

How I'm currently achieving the existence of a "supportive environment": Tonight I'm meeting with three MFA alumni for our own "poetry workshop". The plan is that we'll meet together the first Tuesday of the month, emailing each other 1 poem ahead of time. Blogging helps, attending readings at local bookstores, being a member of Seattle Writergrrls (through their online listserve), keeping in touch with Wide-Eyed Poet in Colorado, and other small means of fostering a supportive environment.

More Bronson advice...
Allow for many paths to your goal. Do not fixate on one path, because then you are likely to give up when that path is blocked.

I think I've been learning this part well since graduating from grad school. Diversifying my writing processes, genres, forms, and all that. It's not poetry, but it's published, and it was interesting to research and write...and I get paid a little bit for it.

literary thief

When the Story Stolen Is Your Own - Sherman Alexie's essay from Time

Oh, to be in a graduate level nonfiction theory course during these turbulent times...what sizzling discussion there would be!

poet's nightstand

I'm not sure which organizational habits may be common among poets or other creative writers, but I think it's safe to say that having a large collection and clustering of books around the house arranged in both logical and messy fashion is a shared trait. As a loyal patron of my city's library system, the current checkout items can be found on and under the coffee table, on the dining room table (which is currently doubling as my "writing/laptop table"), and more often by the bed. My nightstand, which is really two metal cage-like cubes (painted white, the kind you assemble with the square sides and plastic corners), houses within its "shelves" an array of books, plus a stack on the floor for the ones I read intermittently and the one which I'm currently reading before falling asleep.

Here's what's on my nightstand:

Expecting Adam by Martha Beck (recommended by Amy Loves Books) - This memoir lived up to the high praise that blogger Amy gave it, as well as Anne Lamott whose blurb on the cover claimed it was, "A wonderful book, funny, unbelievably tender, and smart." The fascinating insights into what it meant (means?) to be Harvard, a little bit of growing up Mormon (sort of), with the troubling pregnancy that the author experienced at age 25 which led her on a spiritual odyssey and an entirely new philosophy of life. I'm wondering if there is a sequel yet, because she includes these riveting fast forwards about what life with Adam, her son with Down Syndrome, is like after his birth, at age 3, age 6, and points in between. From a non-fiction literary theory point of view, her construction of the book is artful and complex. The generous use of leaf bullets which function as asterisks, to show a shift in time from one scene or anecdote to the next, help create a narrative thread that sustains compassion and suspense. We know Adam lives and Martha's life is changed profoundly, but we don't know how she emotionally and spiritually survives until the end.

One of my favorite passages is from Chapter 9: Martha is entering a store, with her three children, and Adam delays himself by exploring the display of plants outside. An old farmer observed Adam and tells Martha, "He didn't just smell the flowers...He smelled the shrubs, too. He smelled every bush they have out there. I think he even smelled the dirt." I don't want to spoil the surprise twist to this encounter, but this section ends with Beck's analysis:

"For every old man who invites you outside to smell the bushes, there are at least three obsequious salespeople who will congratulate you on having 'such cute little girls,' while they look awkwardly past the boy with Down Syndrome, trying to pretend he isn't there. The prejudice, sometimes even hostility, can burn like acid. But along with this pain, Adam brought with him a sweetness that surpasses anything I ever felt before he was conceived. It comes from looking at the heart of things, from stopping to smell not only the roses but the bushes as well. It is a quality of attention to ordinary life that is so loving and intimate it is almost worship." - page 75-76

* * *

Education Myths by Jay P. Greene, with the subtitle What Special Interest Groups Want You to Believe About our Schools-- And Why It Isn't So. I've only read the entire chapter of "The Teacher Pay Myth" so far. I'm not sure how yet to respond to his comments. I do believe that if you have a Master's degree in WA State, the teacher salary is not bad. And since working more "outside of education" I better understand (and appreciate) the value of the retirement plan, life insurance, and having dental insurance in addition to health insurance that includes vision coverage. However, I do remember that my base salary my first year was $22,950. That was the fall of 1997. I had only a BA, no extra credits, and no years of experience since I was 21 and just out of college, having completed my student-teaching internship and four months of substitute teaching experience the previous academic year. I supplemented that first-year salary with the stipends from being the Freshman Class Advisor and JV Fastpitch Softball Coach. I also lived with my parents, and still drove their car. Pathetic, in retrospect—but all of the other first-year teachers I knew who were recent college grads lived with their parents if they worked close enough to home. By spring, I eventually bought my own car. I used to think of it as the only tangible reward of my first year of teaching.

That school year, from the end of August through the second week of June, I consistently worked 10-12+ hours a day, except for Fridays. Quite often I came into the building on Saturdays to complete additional grading and planning, in addition to the load of work I took home each weekend and "vacation". School started at 7:20 a.m., which meant the teacher day began at 6:50 a.m. Yuck. Teachers could leave at 2:30 (school let out at 2:00), but I really only remember leaving this early a few times. The most common reason for leaving at 2:30 was to get a latte from a local coffee shop with some fellow teachers and then head back to the building to work some more.

By the semester break, I was losing myself; by March, I was utterly exhausted. Which makes the fact that I was essentially coerced into coaching the JV team more understandable now, because I didn't know anything about fastpitch (only regular slowpitch softball). That’s how desperate the admin. were to have teachers for coaches. (I think in-building staff held only 25% of the coaching positions.)

I remember I was part of a secret "5 and Under Club"--a group of teachers who occasionally went out for dinner or lunch (during the teacher workshop days) in order to build camaraderie and support each other. The only requirement to join—you had to be teaching for 5 yrs or less. Or it might have been that you had to have been at that particular school for 5 yrs or less. I can't remember now. But I think 90% of the faculty fell into either category. The point was: we were all struggling in our own haze of disillusionment and stress, which we knew would lead to burnout eventually. The school environment and issues going on at the time in this urban school were very challenging. By April I knew of at least a handful of teachers who admitted to being on anti-depressants to cope with the work-related stress and anxiety. The future did not look promising if I stayed.

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also by the nightstand . . .
The Secret Life of Bees by Sue Monk Kidd – Beautiful prose, lyrical and even haunting at times, but it’s been slow reading for reasons I can only blame on the fact that there have been more riveting books to read. It’s slow, meditative fiction; that requires contemplation about the characters and their motivations. A melancholy tone pervades much of the narrative. Or perhaps my procrastination is because I’m not ready for it to end? Either way, I only have 50 pages left.

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No poetry on the nightstand? the floor?

I keep a small supply of poetry books on hand for occasionally nighttime reading. But after reading a plethora of fiction and literary theory for the past two years, it’s really enjoyable to indulge in fiction. And there is always poetry. I went to two local poetry readings the month of January, Sexton’s collected poems rests on the dining table next to my laptop as I write this, along with the Winter issue of Prairie Schooner. Poetry is still everywhere. Everywhere.

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And . . . the virtual nightstand:

• The PEN's response to Nasdijj
• a writer who publicly reveals the evil vices of a former boss (isn't this a fantasy we all have?) . . . I remember that a month before the new HS principal came, at a school I used to teach at, a teacher from the principal's former HS (and last place of employment) emailed our staff to warn us of his disguised evils, wish us luck and sarcastically give sympathy to us (though none of us, as best as I can recall, were responsible for his being hired...I was still mourning that my favorite assistant principal who had interviewed for the position didn't get it, in favor of the out-of-state newcomer).
• February issue of OutThere Monthly
• Seattle Writergrrls Zine
  

Bait and Switch

Packed powder, blue skies, sunshine in January. Ingredients for a great day on the mountain (earlier this week). Athletic ski stance, working on my turns, and finally using my poles right. Planting them correctly--just a little flick on the snow as I make my next turn, loose arms, shoulders straight and staying focused on the fall line. The intense rays made the snow just soft enough to get good turns in and spray a little powder.

After a late lunch and realizing tight quads would make me not as "aggressive" for the afternoon portion of the day (and Judd had an hour of "bump shack" duty--required of all ski patrollers), I snuggled into a blue window seat in the patrol lodge to finish Barbara Ehrenriech's latest book of investigative journalism, Bait and Switch: The (Futile) Pursuit of the American Dream.

Some of my favorite parts:
"As the best-seller Who Moved My Cheese advises, dislocated professionals must learn to adapt to new flavors of cheese as the old ones are taken away. But when skilled and experienced people routinely find their skills unwanted and their experience discounted, then something has happened that cuts deep into the very social contract that holds us together." - page 217

- a passage she quoted from Lucy Kellaway's article, "Companies Don't Need Brainy People" (Financial Times, 11/22/2004): "Think what characterises the really intelligent person. They can think for themselves. They love abstract ideas. They can look dispassionately at the facts. Humbug is their enemy. Dissent comes easily to them, as does complexity. These are traits that are not only unnecessary for most business jobs, they are actually a handicap when it comes to rising through the ranks of large companies." - p. 228-229
. . . Ehrenreich goes on to comment that, "It is a strange team in which everyone is equally good-natured, agreeable, and not too threateningly bright . . . it seems counterproductive to bar diversity in personality . . . [an employee] risks being dismissed for failing to be a sufficiently compliant 'team player'."

When I working as a "project manager/techincal writer" I heard these comments and feedback from my "co-managers", sometimes directly and sometimes through others' comments:

1. It was suggested that maybe I didn't "fit in" with the rest of the managers because I asked too many questions - and therefore, I wasn't a "team player". . . (this started after I questioned the intent/purposes for a "communications workshop" which was really a PhD student's research study, who was a friend of the boss/owner). It's important to note that the there were 6 other managers, plus myself and the owner. The number of other employees? 5 (at that time) - most of them sarcastically commented that while the managers had their hour-long monthly meetings, they were the ones doing all the work. (Oh, and sometimes the owner's husband also sat in on these meetings, though he didn't have any managerial duties, didn't oversee any employees or area, only occasionally helped with sales and marketing tasks, some admin. tasks, and janitorial tasks around the office.)

Really, it didn't take 8 people to manage 5 employees and do all the work. Everyone was over 49, except for the boss's son (appointed as "Marketing Director" - no completed college-degree, no prior marketing experience), the Ops Manager (see #2 below), and myself. I once told the owner that I didn't want to attend the manager meetings because it interferred with my primary job duties, didn't feel like my comments were sincerely heard or valued.

(Therefore, it felt like a waste of time to me. If others wanted to make rash business decisions and get emotional about issues that was fine, but I didn't want to witness the incompetency and asked for my thoughts but then discounted in response every time; I had better things to do with my time at work.)

I also proposed that the group be called the "Leadership Team" or something like that, because only 2 of us (me included) were actually responsible for directly supervising workers. And the general manager managed everybody, when he was in the office. (He usually only worked about 20 hrs a week sometimes, and would sometimes be out of town for days at a time.) The others managed their "area" or "department", such as marketing or billing, therefore they were considered an essential part of the decision-making team. Unfortunately, the loudest (and rudest) often were the ones talking most (and usually without sound sense or logic). I commented privately to the owner (who I'll now call "Sally") that it seemed like she was being disrespected by a certain 2 "managers" (who I'll refer to as "Fay" and "Jill") because they talked over her, interrupted, and generally didn't allow her to facilitate the meeting. Sally excused their behavior, calling them "strong-willed women." But really, they were just bitches. There IS a difference. However, she agreed it was getting out of hand and talked to the guilty, after which behavior improved somewhat. (Sally was also learning to stop the behavior from continuing in the meeting by raising a palm, and saying, "Wait, I'm still talking." It was interesting how Fay didn't have basic communications skills suitable for the workplace. Jill was better, she had a college degree and more work experience.)

2. Because I was college-educated, I acted like I was better than others. - This was a common critique of anyone in the office who had a college degree, or even took college classes. Because Sally and the General Manager did not have bachelor's degrees, they felt threatened even by the Operations Manager, "Keri", who had PhD work (albeit in anthropology). A worker taking accounting classes finishing up her AA was even pushed out of her new bookkeeping duties because she started questioning some of the billing and financial practicies and mistakes of the company and the former bookkeeper Fay, who was now the "office manager". Fay only's qualifications were her on-the-job experience, but she becomes the bookkeeper again. Fay couldn't even do cash flow analysis reports or create a budget, and refused to learn how and the software to assist with it (claiming it was too difficult, frustrated her, and she didn't have time for it--because she worked part-time hours.) So Keri, putting aside her other job duties, taught herself how to do it, using college accounting textbooks and Excel software.

I would like to write an insider's view article about what it was like working for a small business, who ran like a "family business" where the owner and her husband have a wheelchair decal on their rearview mirror and park in the disabled spots even though both are walking without any aids and go on frequent vacations (Hawaii, Las Vegas, etc.). Where the oldest son, who gets laid off from his pastor job, is now the "Marketing Director" (were we hiring one?), yet he fails to bring in substantial profitable new clients which leads to greater cash flow problems--and he signs up for expensive out-of-state marketing conferences, then whines about having to attend them. The owner's husband (an outspoken homophobic/racist) is the highest paid salary employee, yet is described by the owner/wife as being "computer illiterate...give him easy tasks...he can make copies, prepare folders, whatever you need done." He made too-light copies, emptied the trash bins, answered phones but directed calls inaccurately and couldn't correctly tell someone who was on the line and what it was regarding--resulting in numerous unnecessary disruptions. And the company paid for the owner's rental house on a lake, SUV lease, gas, food, Starbucks, Nordstroms Rack, Toys-R-Us, $100 dinners for 2 (called "marketing event"), a fishing trip to Alaska with two employees (called a "marketing conference" in the expense report), and over $500 in tickets to a major league baseball game (another "marketing event"). Some of these may be fine and well, but then to threaten to "lay off" some people to get out of the hole and shove work onto others isn't the responsible business solution.

I hope I don't sound bitter, because I'm not. It was facinating lesson in human psychology and disorganized leadership. I'm much happier not working there anymore, and not having to see Fay ever again...well, that is priceless. Once I realized the limits to being able to utilize my brain and skills in that environment, that change was slow, that efficiency and education were not real values, that incompetent and unprofessional (even rude) people would stay in their positions despite numerous mistakes and inadequacies just because they were "friends" with the owner, I saw no prudence in staying. My friend in "Organizational Leadership and Development" advised: Get out of there as soon as you (and make sure you're fairly compensated while you're still there).

It's actually hilarious to be able to step back and ruminate on the incompetence and at times unethical behavior of Sally, especially one who liked to talk about her faith and "trust in God". Her and her "strong Christian family" makes me shake my head. I wish my friends still there could leave and be better respected for their work and intelligence. Fear of loss of income, health insurance, and the question of "where else could I get paid this much to work part-time" keeps them there. And the illusion that they can "make a difference." (Which I'm not sure can be aptly used when working with a for-profit business, especially one documented to line the owner's pockets and promote high turnover/layoffs among the ones who do the direct labor work for clients.) Sadly, one former employee lost her job when she had to go out of state to take care of a tragically ill parent. Because a small business is exempt from the "Family Medical Leave Act", she had no job security. So though she was a very strong employee, loyal and willing to telecommute (and was even offered this plan by the owner), the offer was retracted and the employee was simply told over the phone by Fay (when calling to finalize things with Sally), "Oh, you don't work here anymore."

As a public service: To all you in Washington state, you wonder how you can get health insurance without an employee group plan or state assistance, go to: www.asuris.com And I'm sure there are other companies that offer similar plans for individuals. As Ehrenreich points out, since white-collar workers will have numerous jobs throughout a lifetime, employer-provided health benefits should not be counted. Having your own health insurance assures that you will be covered no matter what happens, free you to make the best job choices, and not be grouped together with older and unhealthy co-workers on a group plan that may be dropped or whose co-premiums may rise drastically. If I get a job that provides insurance, I'll ask for compensation to cover my individual plan--which will actually save the company money since my plan (which is just as good, no doubt) is half the total of the company per-person premuim.

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...on a related note (to skiing), someone recently made me aware of this: Indoor snow skiing. They do it in Dubai.